Showing posts with label need/want. Show all posts
Showing posts with label need/want. Show all posts

Monday, February 20, 2023

3696 Monday, February 20th - afternoon

11:56… I was going to ask Joni if there was any topic that she would want to see covered for a homework project, but I didn't.


I just posted a handful of posts on the blog site, but there hasn't been many views on it yet.  Only Nay really knows about it, so that's probably why.  It's not even a good use of probably, it's more of a definite case than anything.


12:02… the Noon doses have been taken/applied, so now I can get back to work.


Work?  There's definitely a part of me that misses the everyday routine of getting up, going to work and living that part of life.


When I was working and living that everyday life, I think I had the question of what it would be like if I was to ever become disabled.  It was hard to imagine as a busybody, but here I am!  Life today is still about routines, but at a different pace, obviously.


The feeling of productivity has taken a whole new perspective.  Productivity is now for me and not for whoever is signing my cheques, which is an important distinction.


The social life is also not where it used to be either.  It's definitely an important aspect of life, in theory.  Everyone is different and that includes everyone's value on a social life.


I enjoy being social, but it isn't the most important thing to me.  I can spend some time alone, mostly because I don't feel a need to plot grand schemes of death and destruction.  Granted, those who do were probably treated poorly in social situations.  There are some deep rooted topics here, yikes!


I kind of wish that I had a topic to write about.  I could jump from topic to topic, but that will be hard to keep straight, as you might have already noticed.


Okay, being disabled… Yes, there is more than enough time now.  Trying to stay busy and trying to find value in just about anything that I can get my hands on.


With all this time, there certainly isn't enough good TV programming to fill it up.  Of course, that's a personal opinion, which can be debated by anyone and likely everyone.  


Alright, here's a topic that has popped up in my head, which could be associated with the topic of being disabled.  I've now gone down the path of "nothing really matters" and as dark as that is, it's an interesting idea.


12:33… that's likely what roots the "looking for something more in life" thought process and understandably so.  People have had a history of thinking that there has to be something more to this life, which attempts to be enough to keep everyone going.


There has been no proof that there is any more beyond this life, so we have got to do our best to try and enjoy what we've got.  There is a general acceptance or belief that there are things that everyone can do to make each other happy.  Unfortunately, there are those who don't subscribe to those ideas and their animal instincts end up driving their way through life, which have some potential for being pretty awful for everyone involved or looking upon them.  Of course, that's a sliding scale according to everyone's personal opinion.


Personal opinion is a slippery slope.  What have I got myself into?


Right… the time being disabled… let's try to stay on that topic.


The hours awake have surely shrunk… there are no late nights anymore, not voluntarily anyway.  The hours staying up with TV shows, movies, sporting events, beverages and friends aren't what they used to be, that's for sure.  Trying to squeeze everything into the hours available is fighting a lost cause.  Accepting that what you have to work with is less is most important, because then you're not wasting time debating how it's all going to fit and you just get right to work on living your life.


13:44… well, I just had a call from Dad, he was having some Excel problems and needed my help.  Unfortunately, it looked like he mistakenly deleted the sheet that he was looking for, instead of hiding it, which I thought was a possibility.  


While tinkering and looking for the options to unhide the sheets, he went off and screwed around with some functions and accidentally hid another sheet.  His impatience did him in and he's now back to being a little kid.  That was a 41-minute phone call, that was fun.


Now, where was I?  If you've accepted the changes in your life, then a lot less fighting will be going on in your head and you'll have more time to do what you need.  


Also, the debate of knowing what you want versus what you need is also another good time saving step, if done right away.


Having a good handle on what you value is another important aspect, both for the disabled and able-bodied types.  If you need to have a set of values decided by an all-seeing and all-knowing overlord, then so be it.  For me, personally, it's about keeping life easy, which does involve treating others well, because you'll generally get what you give in return, which keeps your life working well.


Taking a longer look at what I value now, it's a much shorter list than what it used to be.  I look at that list, which isn't in list form yet, and I don't miss the things that used to be on it.  I used to care about professional sports, movies and a few more things, but I'm not losing any sleep being oblivious to those things.


I still enjoy helping out where I can, staying active, writing, listening to music, being entertained (to a less important level) and other little things.  I'm not going to list them all here now, but if you were to ask me about a random element, I'm sure I could confidently and quickly say whether or not it matters in my life.


Everyone is going to be different, in the size of their list and the approximate value assigned to each element, but as long as you know what you believe is important to you, then you're ahead of the game.


14:16… man, that was a lot of rambling.


Wednesday, September 21, 2022

2941 Wednesday, September 21st - early morning

05:38… "the stress-free lifestyle" has been my baseline for the longest time.  In the hospital, I had a good number of nurses say how surprised they were at how old I actually was.  Who wants stress anyway?


Being a single man, it allows me a lot of freedom.  The cost of being single is far less than otherwise.  An efficient life is a stress-free life, which has likely been my mantra for the longest time and thinking about that now, I seem to remember that.


I remember way back when I was getting started in life, there was the issue of paying taxes.  When I had to pay income tax after making my first filing, I wasn't terribly happy with that situation.  Then I remember Randy G., an old friend of my uncle Dale, he showed me a line on the income tax form, back when I started at Aetna, where I could agree to have a certain amount taken off each cheque and then I would be guaranteed to get some money back when I filled my taxes.  I would never see that money, so I wouldn't miss it, and I had always put down $40 in that line.


I did that for every job I had in Canada and if I was to get money back, I felt that I didn't have to worry about my taxes and I was right.  Of course, Randy didn't recommend that course of action, it was something that I had come up with.  For an extra $40 a cheque, I didn't have to worry or stress.  The government didn't come knocking to give me money.


I would also overpay my bills, eliminating the stresses of owing money, because I am underpaying.  If I could afford it, why not?  It might help one day, if I was struggling for money.


I was fortunate to be a part of the white collar workforce for so long too.  It wasn't taxing physically and the mental stresses could be managed.  I didn't need to be overly successful, that line of work helped me to live comfortably and efficiently.  I had what I needed and I didn't want anymore than that.


I'm thinking about becoming a minimalist.  In some ways, I already am, but if I can be more efficient with it, why am I not doing that right now?  It's certainly going to be an idea moving forward, but it will face some difficulties, as people seem to enjoy giving me stuff.  I don't need decorations, as nice as some of them may be.


And then Christmas!  Besides being the religious holiday, which as you may have gathered, I could do without, the pseudo-commercial holiday is also a sore spot.  It's a designer stress-filled holiday about gift giving and receiving.  I can safely say that I don't need it, I can be nice to everyone all the time, I don't need to feel extra special about it.  If I need anything, I'll just go get it.


There's some early morning thoughts, as I lie here in bed.


06:28… it's time to get up and get going!


Thursday, August 4, 2022

2817 Thursday, August 4th - afternoon

 12:32… I made it up to 10k before I mixed my smoothie and my brain is still churning away.  I’ve added a couple more points to the Random Thoughts, since I’m sort of in the mood.


12:46… I have moved back to the couch, if I'm going to write, I want to be comfy.


The points about inspiration and competitiveness are interesting ones.  Both are definitely instinctual and both have played major roles in my life.  I've drawn a lot of inspiration to be hard working from numerous places, both my parents have been hard workers, both having the need to keep busy, so that portion is likely genetic.  The sporting portion of me has always been somewhat competitive, within my abilities.  Quantified measures are there to be improved upon and that desire plays a big role in my Fitbit activities.  


13:06… I tried to convince myself that the desire there acts as logic, trying to associate logic in this truly instinctual side.  It's not logical to need to be better competitively.  Sure, it can afford you more to be better, but it's only logical when the need/want for more is there.  Do we absolutely need more of anything than anyone else?  When it comes to basic needs, sustenance requirements shouldn't be better than anyone else, but that thought may not be completely correct.  We all need sustenance and it's only logical to seek it out when it's needed, which can be driven back to instinctual.


I feel like I am spinning my wheels here.  Do we need to be competitive about sustenance?  No, we all need it.  We can share or decide to properly divvy it out, if there isn't enough.  The instinctual need to survive may create competition, if we're not all on the same team.


Everything has caveats.  


I'm really losing track here.


Inspiration is an instinctual draw from something or someone you believe in.  Yes, I drew my hard working beliefs from my parents, not that they ever accomplished anything great from it.  It kept them both out of trouble, but at the cost of their overall health.


I also drew some inspiration about not quitting from them too.  There were a number of athletes who shone bright when they worked through their difficulties and a lot of people looked up to them because of it.


Being trustworthy about following through with what you say you are going to do is another way to shine in many people's eyes.  If you can find someone you can believe in, there is a great chance that you will be inspired by them and reflect from them appropriately.


Being inspired by someone is definitely instinctual, as well as being competitive.  There is some logic in wanting to be the best, because there is a great chance that you will earn more of what you want if you are.  Do you "need" more of the desired prize?  That's debatable.


If you're competing with yourself to be better, the logic does get lost.  Do you "need" to be more healthy… Well, if you're starting from an unhealthy point, then yes.  There's logic there, but if you're starting from a healthier point, then maybe not.


There are definitely some grey areas out there in many places, but there is the benefit of a healthy debate.


The points of subjectivity and objectivity are interesting here.


13:54… Brad called to do his follow-up on the Bipasha visit on Monday and I remembered to cite the team effort from Vytalty and that was good enough for him.  I'm glad that went well.


14:13… I just received a notification that the Diclo cream is ready.  I’ll go get it and the 300mg Gabapentin pills tomorrow on the walk with Mark.  


Thursday, April 28, 2022

2446 Thursday, April 28th - morning

06:35… it’s a little bit of an early start, but before I really get going, I want to add that bit to my Need/Want list, which I meant to do yesterday, but it sort of got away from me.


  • Needs

    • Need to survive

    • Need to help others survive

    • Need to support the cause I’ve attached myself to

    • Need to do it because I said I would

    • I have to have that

    • Instinctual need

  • Wants

    • Want that to entertain myself

    • Want to read that

    • Want to see that

    • Really want that to be mine

    • Really want to support that

  • Agreeable Notions

    • That sounds like a good idea

    • I’ll give that a try

    • If you don’t want it, I’ll take it

  • Disagreeable Notions

    • No thanks

    • That’s not a good idea

  • Not Wanting

    • I’ll stay away from that

    • What were you thinking?

  • Not Needing

    • My happiness depends on me not being involved with that

    • My happiness depends on me not having that


There, the instinctual need has been added to the current list.


Well, it was an early start, mostly because I made my second deposit and then I looked at the clock and it was only shortly after 06:00.  That was my brain’s cue to get going and I wasn’t going to put up much of a fight.  So, then I was off and running.


  • Shorts change: I went to go find the shorts first, next in line were some blue/greens.

  • Made the bed: I also tidied the bed.

  • Lung recruitment: all of that before the usual hob number one, which came in at number three this morning.

  • Bottle empty: the deposits were emptied.

  • Turn the coffee maker on: the tap water needed time to warm up and this needed to happen.

  • Wash up: I started washing a bit early, the hot water didn’t finally land until the second scrub.

  • Weigh-in: the phone and the scale weren’t talking again.  The batteries must be going on it.

  • Computer logged on: I said ‘good morning’ to Elle.

  • Pills and vitamins: took the morning dose.

  • Deodorant: sprayed, yes.

  • Voltaren/Diclo10%: splashed, no.  The experiment continues this morning.

  • Moisturiser: dolloped and spread, yes.

  • Shoulder brace: the brace wasn’t as easy this morning, but I eventually got it.

  • Shirt change: a bluer shirt today.

  • PowerBreathe: 30 inhales. (06:59) the first round is recorded.

  • Head start: (07:01) the step count today may not be pushed too hard, but the 10k still needs to be done.


07:21… the first timer is in the books and it was tougher, but I stuck to it.  2.6k and 3 Zone minutes to start.  The streaks will be pushed today, but rest is needed.  It’s a fine balance.  I need more coffee.


07:24… I only have one banana left, so the Instacart order will need to be placed.  I’m going to start some laundry and have that ready for Bipasha.  I think those are my big items on the to do list.


  • Email:

    • Main account: a few pieces of junk and some promos there this morning.

    • Gmail: a Safeway promo here.

  • Upper Deck: the free pack was dull.

  • Facebook: two birthdays, only one got a nod.  There were a few likes in the news feed.  There were not very many memories today.

  • Twitter: one good tweet to like, but otherwise nothing.

  • Fitbit:

    • Steps yesterday: 35.6k, my best day in almost 3 years.  

    • Floors: 45 were collected.

    • Active Minutes: 283 minutes.

    • Active Heart: 74 Zone minutes.

    • Active Hours: 10/10.

    • Sleep: 426 minutes, a good night’s sleep.

    • Weight: 172.2 pounds.

    • Stress Management: 81.

    • Readiness: 60.  It feels like less.

    • RHR: 70 bpm, yesterday’s dropped to 71 bpm, so it’s finally going the right way.

    • Water: two are logged.

    • Challenge: 31.6k ahead of Sheldon.

  • Google Calendar: nothing on today.

  • Budget: nothing happened after the morning work.

    • Questrade: slight gains in both, but they’re still red for the week.

  • Fantasy Hockey:  no new points here last night.

  • Sports Interaction: neither parlay paid yesterday.  Seven bettable hockey games and six bettable American League baseball games, which made for five parlay bets.  The Blue Jays can’t participate in parlay bets, but they can be game bets and with Alec Manoah on the hill today, a $5 bet was made.


08:24… the routine is done.  It’s weird not having that grind of expectations today.  It’s like a vacation of sorts.


08:43… the weird morning continues.  I checked the Chromecast for the possibility of the Chelsea match against Tottenham and I’ll be able to see it at 12:45.  I continued to look at the Chromecast while on the ball and I thought I would watch the New Mutants, a Marvel movie that I hadn’t seen yet, but then I remembered that I wasn’t done with the physio and it would be tough to watch with exercises that need to happen.  If I get it done in good time, I’ll give the movie a watch before the Chelsea match.


08:48… it’s a lower body day.


08:53… okay, I’m ready now.


  • PowerBreathe: 30 inhales. (08:55) the second round is done.

  • Physio Exercises

    • Warm Ups

      • Side Shuffle: 21 laps, head up and focusing on the right foot.

      • Single leg stands with a pole: 5 stands on each leg, 5 head turns on each stand

      • 4 Square Tiles, eyes up & head turns: 10 laps

      • March in place at the sink, shoulder checking: 10 shoulder checks both sides

      • Left hand/head resistance: 10 pushes/pulls

      • Chin tucks: 5 tucks x the count of 30

      • Squeeze the orange ring: 50 squeezes (09:12)

    • Lower Body

      • Right leg weight step ups on step board: 40 step ups

      • Step up and down with step board no aids: 20 step overs

      • Single step, forwards and backwards, right foot on the Bosu Ball with an aid: 30 steps, back and forth combos

      • Reverse S Walk with target, focus on a small target: 10 laps

      • Bottle lid taps with my toes with head turns: 40 taps

      • Sink squats with elastic: 30 squats

      • Chair squats with elastic: 20 squats

      • Single leg extended back lunges: 30 lunges

      • Lateral leg lunges: 20 lunges (09:34)

  • Bosu Ball: (09:54) a complete timer was completed, 7.6k, 6 Zone minutes and 16 floors, most of those floors came from the physio work.

  • Protein shake: the last Boost vanilla shake is my reward.


09:58… there’s the physio done.  It didn’t come with very many Zone minutes, so if there is work to be had, that’s the reason.


10:02… I shared the original link for the want/need post with Cousin Alex.  I’ll be curious to see what she thinks.


10:12… the Instacart order has been placed.  It shouldn’t be delivered until 15:00.  I’m thinking that I’ll mix the smoothie and start the movie.

Tuesday, April 26, 2022

2441 Tuesday, April 26th - afternoon

12:19… I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these days, as you could probably tell, and one thing popped out at me yesterday… What do I want?


It’s an open-ended question, yes, but I’ve been working on an answer for that question and I have been craving the chance to write something down.


For me, I’ve never really wanted a whole lot, for the most part, I was listening to ideas and I mainly chased the things that really made sense to my analytical/logical brain.  My brain has always been really good at knowing what I need versus what I want.  Defining that distinction across the board with me has always been important.  If someone presented an idea to me, I’d take some time, the size of the idea would govern how much time, and figure out whether or not it is something that I want or something that I need.  There are also different levels of need and want, the degrees of desire, if you will.


  • Needs

    • Need to survive

    • Need to help others survive

    • Need to support the cause I’ve attached myself to

    • Need to do it because I said I would

    • I have to have that

  • Wants

    • Want that to entertain myself

    • Want to read that

    • Want to see that

    • Really want that to be mine

    • Really want to support that

  • Agreeable Notions

    • That sounds like a good idea

    • I’ll give that a try

    • If you don’t want it, I’ll take it

  • Disagreeable Notions

    • No thanks

    • That’s not a good idea

  • Not Wanting

    • I’ll stay away from that

    • What were you thinking?

  • Not Needing

    • My happiness depends on me not being involved with that

    • My happiness depends on me not having that


That list is a fluid idea and I wouldn’t say it’s complete yet.  I’m sure some more will pop up and show themselves soon.


I guess where this idea stems from is my seemingly lack of desire to have a girlfriend or wife, those ideas have been more “Agreeable Notions” than anything else.  I’ve never really needed the physical pleasures that would be forthcoming from said arrangement.  I certainly enjoyed them, but arguably, I never did a whole lot for those activities to make them awesome, likely because the need or want was never there.


There are likely some good arguments to be made about this and I’ll hear them.  There also could be another post here soon, talking about liking, loving and the flip side to those thoughts.


I think one of the great things with this brain of mine is associating value to the needs and wants in life.  If I need something, I’ll take some time to figure out how I can achieve that goal and work pretty hard to get there.  I haven’t had too many needs in my life… food, shelter, health care and social interactions come to mind immediately.  I’ve always been someone that stands by their word, if I say that I am going to do something, I’ll do whatever I need to so it happens.


Not having a whole lot of needs is certainly keeping the stress levels down in my life.  There are an extraordinary amount of people who are seemingly always stressed out.  I’ve never needed or wanted that stress, so I’ve done a good job of staying away from it.  The bottom half of the list above is just as important as the top half.


Of course, each level on this list has the associated politeness you can use when you’re approached with said situation.  You can definitely tell how someone values an idea, when approached with it.  Of course, there are a lot of people out there who may overreact to a situation, but are they really overreacting or are they negotiable?


A lot of good things have happened from some Agreeable Notions and there have been some bad results from others.  The real trick is to adapt as you go along.


13:20… I think that’s the bulk of it.  I will likely show it around and get some input on it.